There is SO much shopping to do – I know, go ahead, feel sorry for me!  With the exception of 2 or 3 tops and bottoms, I had to get rid of everything in my closet.  I’ve been wearing the same 2 shorts and 2 t-shirts that we bought after the drains came out for 3 weeks now.  And I’ve been waiting for this 6-ish week mark when the swelling has largely gone away (supposedly).  AND…thanks to my UU Choir in Rockville for their so generous gift…I’m sitting on nice wardrobe budget to get me started!!

So…it’s pretty much time!  You’d think that I would be skipping in glee to the nearest mall (if I could skip – which I cannot just yet!)

And…I ALMOST am…but there has been a sense of hesitation and a feeling that I should go a little slow.  I even tried to say that this is part of my attempt to be less impulsive sometimes and take my time with things – which I would like do occasionally, but in this case, I think that’s a cover!  It’s kind of hard to say why, but I think I’m figuring it out.

So, on Thursday, I decide that I will go to a mall, on my own, for a limited period of time before my first hair cut in 2 months.  I have two goals – find a real bra  (non-underwire, but anything that will give me two distinct breasts rather than the sports bra uni-boob) and discover what my size range is.

I walk in and I’m pretty sure that you would have laughed at my face or started in with the reassurances.  I just felt totally swallowed!  Almost to the point that I didn’t know what to do there!  And I’m thinking, “This is silly.  Of course you know what to do here.”  And I’m telling myself that there is no specific expected outcome, no rush, just experiment, just enjoy it.  I’m walking by these stores and realizing that I could go into any of them when before, 90% of the stores were just automatically off-limits.  AND I’m realizing that I know nothing about them.  Which ones I’ll be drawn too, which ones are out of my price range.  A clerk at Talbots welcomed me warmly as I passed their door and hesitated and I wandered in, but immediately knew that I wasn’t ready either to put myself in someone’s hands or to shop for “real clothes” without some good undergarments and with slightly less wide eyes.

So…I made my way to Penney’s, focused on the bra section, and let my comforting research mentality take over!  I choose one style and getting every permeation of size between 36C and 40D.  Dressing room visit one – I found the most likely bra size and went back and got an armful of other bra styles in that size and close to it.  Plus, grabbed a couple dresses that caught my eye on my way back to my lab (a.k.a dressing room).  Dressing room visit two – success!  Found a bra that worked and happened to try it on at the same time as a beautiful striped maxi dress (which I assumed would swallow me in length) and turned to the mirror and was…well…delighted!!  I was VERY tempted to get another dress that looked good – get this, a purple polka-dotta flirty number!!!  But it was full price ($60) and I talked myself out of it.

With 3 bras and the maxi dress in tow, I went off to my hair appointment.  My wonderful hairdresser chastised me for denying myself the dress – especially at this first stage in the shopping experience and her words stuck as I drove home…so I kept going to another mall near me with another Penneys!!  They didn’t’ have the dress, but apparently my hesitancy about shopping had been banished and I had myself a small whirlwind and a grand time!!

So…the mall did NOT eat me – just almost!  And I’m ready to shop!  Shopping companions beware, I’m coming for you!