Hello!  Hello!!  The longer I go without writing a blog, the more impossible it feels to choose what to write about!  Not that there is a dearth of topics, oh nay nay!

One thing that I am seeing more clearly lately is how emotional energy really does directly correlate to any other kind of energy.  There has been so much focus over the last 10-12 months on so many huge, personal and interpersonal emotional transitions and sometimes I can really see how that’s just as demanding as physical work – especially when it comes to what I feel I have time and energy for beyond that.  And…I’m completely willing to give that emotional energy…I’d just like to do two things.  1)  recognize that it’s a factor in not having energy for other things sometimes and 2)  keep my feelers out for things that can be let go once they’ve been worried or pondered into oblivion.

This past weekend, N. and I freed up a few pieces of emotional energy and that ease translated immediately into being able to make the final few decisions we needed to start a new eating/exercise plan.  No coincidence, I’m sure!

Yes, there is a topic…moving from a life-long diet mentality to the needed guidelines of healthy living, minor course correction and maintenance.  One of those things that conceptualizing is a poor substitute for actually experiencing!

And another topic…the way that I balance “I” and “We” mentality.  My therapist put it this way…there are “I” people and “we” people.  Think of the forest or the tree.  Some folks are SO much an “I” person that they can’t see beyond even a single leaf.  Some are primarily focused on their personal tree.  Some balance the forest and the tree.  Then there is me.  I believe the term she used was “Mega-We.”  This is a fascinating lens to look through!  I do largely like my we mentality and I think it’s very much a core of who I am.  However, I would like to have the “I” more woven in, rather than grasped at with juvenile rebelliousness once it’s built up a need.  Just a small topic there, don’t you think?

Random topic – things that happen when you make a sudden change to the proportion of your body:

• parking a car is no longer possible.  Yup, as a direct result of surgery, I can no longer turn my car into a parking spot between the lines.  This was never a problem.
• long-distance driving.  I don’t know if it’s a different sitting posture or the tailbone thing or the sciatic nerve or what – but I’ve got to figure it out!
• not having a good place to rest my hands…used to stay on my hips!  But they go now to my new favorite place…the flat where the pelvis meets the legs.
• foward-motion.  I can run forward and back with so much more speed and agility!  Someday soon I will win a racquetball game!

One thing that does not change with body proportion:  I am not a Victoria Secret customer!  I mean, get over yourself with the 4 different kinds of tissue paper and the names of things!  I think I tried on the exquisite, the beautiful, the stunning, the gorgeous, the very lovely, the very very lovely…I’m not kidding!!  I found one (ONE!) that I wanted to consider.  The name of it?  The balconet.  That’s right.  Dictionary.com defines that word for us:  a railing or balustrade before a window, giving the effect of a balcony.  Why, I believe that was precisely what I was looking for, Victoria!  I would like to purchase a $50 purple piece of silk that makes me feel like a sexy, voluptuous, oh, what’s the word…balustrade!!!

And one more topic…lately I’ve realized that I feel like I’m waiting most all the time.  Waiting for N’s transition to show us the next steps (not to mention waiting to know what the whole thing is going to feel and look like!)  Waiting for us to get through the rough patches of this past year.  Waiting to get to places that I hope for.  I think that feeling like I’m waiting makes all the things that I do now feel more like transient, treading-water things.  It robs me of just living my life and all it’s moments.  So, I’m going to try and think differently about that.

There!  A Smorgasbord of topics and updates for you!  What should I dive into?